Today’s post in the “Thank You Note” series inspired by: Jimmy Fallon (45%), Jen Hatmaker (25%), Spit Up on My Pants (18%), and Pinterest Crafts- Or As I Like To Call Them: NO (12%)
Thank you, Infant That I Birthed, for spitting up on my outfit before church and then licking my hair while I clean us both up. I love when you deposit a dark, uneven stain suspiciously near my inner thigh and then slick back all those flyaways near my ear with your milky tongue. I’m not even at church yet and you’re bringing me closer to God, got me calling out, “LORD JESUS, COME.” Additionally, I’d like to remind you that I rearranged my organs for you to grow and I wipe your butt every other hour so thank you in advance for changing your first word from DaDa to MaMa. I love you to the moon and back my precious little mess.
Thank you, Pinterest, for reminding me why I just CAN’T EVEN with inventive crafting.
You save other people hours from having to scour the Internet for DIY projects upcycling a garden hose, but me- you save me from myself. When I feel tempted to gather spider web silk to weave a dream catcher or collect my daughter’s baby teeth to make a wind chime, you help me stay true to myself by staying in my lane, which would be blogging about the people who execute these Pinterest masterpieces. I look forward to collaborating with you soon, Pinterest, on other topics like Nail Art, Dollar Store Hacks, and Paleo Vegan Flourless Lemon Poppyseed Breakfast Cake!
In case you missed yesterday’s Thank You Note: People of the Gym
Coming up: Three more days of Thank You Notes…